Saturday 5 April 2014

A Case of Mistaken Reason

Let me begin with two facts. The first is that recently a wooden piece of furniture which I had bought and assembled suffered some minor, but easily reparable, damage. The second fact is that I greeted the discovery of the damage with a mixture of annoyance and concern. Now those two facts do not at first glance seem to be very promising material for a script. Yet when I began to think about my instinctive reaction to the situation, the more I realised there was something there that would stand investigation.

Now annoyance is just a milder form of anger, but anger it is nonetheless. Concern is, in like manner, a milder form of worry, and both emotions are instinctive, negative reactions which originate in the unconscious mind. As I probed more deeply I began to realise that the origins of these emotions was fear, which at first seemed to be a rather preposterous idea. Yet fear is a natural condition of life. It is an instinct we have inherited from our forbears, and further back from other members of the animal kingdom. At earlier periods in our far distant past we were beset by all sorts of dangers against which we had to be constantly on our guard. Danger to life and limb was ever-present, and the consequences of putting oneself in a situation where one was vulnerable and powerless could be dire indeed.

In modern times, at least for most of us perhaps, physical danger is much less in evidence. Yet the instincts remain. Coupled with the fear comes the emotions that will spur us to action if that task becomes necessary; hence the feeling of anger. Now anger usually rises quickly, but then subsides, whilst, on the other hand, worry exists at a relatively low level but is more persistent. Such would be the natural reaction to the fear of attack on one's person by someone close by. Even in modern society, a killer or abuser is first sought among the family of a victim before extending the search to those further afield. 

In the recent situation concerning the article of furniture, it would appear that my sense of "I-ness" had momentarily identified with the furniture, and inwardly recorded the incident as an attack on my self. An old instinct had been inappropriately turned inwards and directed against my ego, and that had in turn triggered an equally inappropriate reaction.

"But so what?" one might ask. "The situation was trivial, and the damage fixed. Get on with life!" Yet if I am truly seeking after truth, to be followed perhaps by wisdom and understanding, I cannot ignore this incident. The truth is that for those few moments I was clearly living in a long-distant past, in a state of illusion. And I have to ask myself how much this activity goes on. The answer is that it goes on all the time. In a world where the past is an illusion, and the present doesn't really exist, except as a meaningless concept, what meaning can I possible attribute to anything I think or have ever thought, feel or have ever felt, or sense or have ever experienced? These three attributes of the ego are, in the end, intrinsically meaningless.

Recently I have wondered about the possibility that I am passing through a "dark night". Now I do think that in some way I am travelling a journey that is going deeper than I have been before. The high excitement of a relatively noisy spiritual life may be giving way to a gentler, more profound experience.  

16 comments:

  1. (Here I shall momentarily suspend my policy of silence on this blog to 'fess up that it was me what broke the furniture but I'm not saying what or how.)

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  2. Food for thought, interesting thoughts! Next time I find something broken or damaged I will remember your words. I don't think my reaction will be anywhere as philosophical as yours, I fear. On the other hand, I am known to take artsy photos of broken objects....

    As for Lucy's words, they made me laught!

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  3. Marja-Leena; Trouble is, one can become so philosophical - even for the best of reasons - that one can forget to get things fixed. And yes, Lucy does have a way with words....and furniture.

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  4. Much of worry consists of cataloguing what might go wrong and mentally rehearsing emergency measures. In natural selection, life-forms that worried survived while those that didn't...uhm, didn't --except trees, maybe. I don't think trees worry. I feel calmer near trees. Do you think we were once arboreal?

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  5. Geo; I think you have a point there; in fact more than one point. I should go and have a sit down somewhere.....under a tree perhaps. Perhaps another thought might strike you, just like it did Sir Isaac Newton.

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  6. It is possible that from time to time (read most of the time) I overthink things. In other words, saying this as nicely as I can, l can relate to your analysis of your reaction Tom.
    I do appreciate George's excuse and fully intend to use it the next time someone tells me to lighten up! :-)
    Here's to gentler profundity.

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  7. I think I know about mistaken reasons for certain reactions. Don't many if not all of us have the tendency to react in an unrealistic and unfounded manner when their ego gets hurt? I have still not learned how to let go of my ego by looking at what's in front of me only. It's just a broken object. Nothing else.
    I must forget about the love, time, money and thoughtfulness that I invested in it but I still occasionally find myself preaching that "things should be treated with respect" when I am faced with a situation such as yours.
    Did Lucy lean too far back on a chair and the dowels jumped out of their nest?

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  8. Halle; Amen to that.....I think.

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  9. Ellena; Your comment sounds distressingly familiar. On the Lucy front, I couldn't possibly say what article of furniture was the object of my ire. :)

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  10. I find your written thoughts about your sudden irritation with the broken bit of furniture to be quite remarkable. When I experience anger (or irritation) the feeling never lasts long. I can't remember the last time I was annoyed with an object but that's most usual when the loss, either temporary or permanent, causes inconvenience or unanticipated expense. I can't say I've ever considered the deep historic meanings behind these reactions and that's what struck me about your post.

    Worry, of course, is a different thing. I often wake up worried or disturbed for no apparent cause. As someone wiser than me has said, 'Fear is always of the future'. This is something I will have to consider more closely during my own meditation times.. or now, for that matter.

    Thank you again, Tom, for your well considered words.

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  11. Susan; I suspect that most of us , most of the time, do not consider what kies behind our reactions, deeply historic or otherwise. It does seem to me, however, that if one is to further the search into "Knowing Oneself", and hopefully to overcome the sense of being at the beck and call of our subconscious programming, then this kind of investigation is necessary.

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  14. I wish I could satifactorily translate "Ehe isch misch uffreesch, iss mir's egal." It's dialect from deep in a Frankfurter's soul. When I feel myself starting to become angry, I say this phrase, which means something like, "before I rouse myself, it's all the same to me." I breathe in and regain control of myself. Now worry is another matter. My dear friends know me as something of a worrier.

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  15. Rouchswalwe; I like the principle that you offer, but my experience is in these situations that the arousal of negative feelings is so quick as to be tantamount to being instantaneous, and therefore lacking of any thinking time. Obviously it cannot be instantaneous because, in theory, situations could arise when some other reaction might be more survival-wise appropriate.

    Now whatever you do, don't worry. It's all right. :)

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